* Questions for Dear Ernie can be sent to: firstname.lastname@example.org
I am a freshman here at Benedictine University and have just come to the realization that I am trying to change myself to get in with the “popular” crowd. I have lost a sense of who I am, and because I have been going out all the time with my friends, my grades really slipped first semester.
How do I stay true to myself?
Tired of Faking it
Dear Tired of Faking it,
I personally also faced this problem when I started hanging out with a new flock, and I wish that I reminded myself more to be unapologetically myself. You are who you are, and you won’t ever be able to find someone who is made up of the same wonderful characteristics as you. Embrace that fact.
Going away to college, you find yourself in a whole new atmosphere that you have never experienced before with people you have never met before. College can be a very fun and exciting time for you, but it tests your personal growth, independence, and self-acceptance of who you have become up to this point. Always remember that you don’t have to be the person that you think everyone expects you to be, and certainly shouldn’t feel pressured from the people around you. If someone does not accept you for who you really are, they are not true friends.
It is never too late, every day is a chance to make things right and take a step closer to the person that you want to become.
Keep on soaring,
(Note: The advice given is from Candor writers, student-to-student, and does not reflect the opinion of the university).