The Candor

Breathe a Gasp of Relief

I can’t believe that only four weeks have passed so far and I am already finding myself so completely stressed out! I have been falling behind in classes, I was sick with what I call the “H1Y Virus” (Have one Yearly) because every year about this time I get sick for a few days. I guess that’s better than the alternative in never knowing when you’re going to be sick but anyways, I digress.

At the same time I was waking up this morning to give away basically everything you’re told to never give out over the phone (Bank accounts, earnings, Social Security numbers, deeds to my unborn children) I was thinking about how nice it will be when this is all over.

Isn’t that what we’re all working towards?

Let’s face it, there are many different kinds of people on campus when it comes to being involved with extracurriculars. There’s those who do nothing except play video games at their dorm and laugh at the idea of working in their time away from classes, those who are extremely involved and jump at every chance to help out the university and those who appear to be interested in becoming involved, only to change their mind or back out at the last minue.

Then there’s me, a messed-up mix of all three. Don’t get me wrong, I love Benedictine far more than my past college experiences. But, I’ve had a far different life than most people that has seen me float in a psychological limbo for quite some time. Only recently was I able to break my mental purgatory and actually sleep soundly in a bed of hopes, dreams and realization.

A few weeks ago, I asked the love of my life to be the wife in my life and tie the knot. She said yes, amidst a screen of tears, and I don’t remember a time in my life where I have been happier. Not only that, but a few days ago, my fiance and I purchased a condo together that we will be moving into in December.

School is great and I have no doubt that it will be one of the periods of time in my life I look back at quite fondly. But until you’ve looked into the eyes of the person you know you can’t live without, professed your love for the person and had them return the response with equal emotion, life doesn’t always quite make sense.

There’s no guarantee with your degree that you will be happy with what you are doing after college, there’s only a promise towards your qualifications towards getting a job, which isn’t guaranteed either. Many of you are probably going through life right now enjoying every moment, connecting with people in the most positive ways and being someone you can truely believe in. If you are, then that’s awesome and you should be proud of yourself for getting to this point fairly early in life.

For those of you who haven’t yet, don’t give up. If you haven’t yet found the one person that shares the same life dreams with you and always makes you happy, then that just means you’re normal. Everything is easier to do when it has a purpose behind it that you truely believe in. Think I put up with classes that weren’t in my major for so many years because of a shiny degree for myself at the end of it? Well, in a way I guess that could be true, but I couldn’t have pushed myself as hard as I did or enjoy the extra work I was doing if I didn’t have someone to work for.

Find that someone that makes you want to work at brightening their day everytime they’re sad. Find someone who will be excited for you when you do something extra. Find someone who understands all the hard work you put into everyday things in life, like trying to stay connected with old friends, building new connections for a better future and doing what you need to do in order to stay sane.

Whatever you do: Don’t settle!

Even when I thought good days would never start coming my way, I was given a chance to take a deep, relaxing breath of fresh air. I’m able to stop now and appreciate all I have, and to know what it is that I have to do in order to provide for the people I love.

Sometimes a little thought of hope is all we need to give our spirit a little gasp of relief. And hey, if mine took until the weeks prior to my 23rd birthday, don’t be discouraged if you haven’t received yours yet.

I hope this brightens your day and gives you at least a little bit of hope about where your life is headed. Feel free to pass this on to friends and family who are maybe going through a rough patch in their life. Hopefully it will bring them that little bit of assurance that good things are always possible.

I’ll leave you with two quotes (okay, so I got them from fortune cookies) that I always keep with me, and I’m not normally a spiritual or superstitious, so for me to carry these around is really saying something:

“Wisdom is acquired by experience, not just by age.” and

“If you don’t enjoy what you have, how could you be happier with more?”